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Safe Zones (AKA De-Escalation Zones): The modern-day equivalent of concentration camps where certain “amenities,” such as better tents and makeshift houses, have been introduced in order to lessen the overall negative psychological impact of the phenomenon on those who might inadvertently become aware of it, thus making it ideological acceptable. 

Saudomy: The practice of abandoning a longtime ally in favor of a longtime enemy for no apparent reason, and despite the fact that both the betrayed ally and the embraced enemy tend to embrace similar ruling ideologies and embrace same troubling behavior. Rational observers of this behavior conclude that the causes of this practice should be sought in the inner workings and ruling ideology of the adopting side, rather than the newly betrayed or embraced sides.

(The) Saffrogettes: The name given to members of the Saffron Guild, even the men who, in fact, make up the majority of the membership. The Safrogettes are fundamentally shitty people who try to hide their basic shittiness through deployment of colorful imagery and flowery language. They specialize in attending the signing ceremonies of any deal struck with the devil, hailing it as breakthrough, and castigating its critics.

Screeding: 1) A form of journalism where established journalists rail against the injustices perpetrated by certain regional and/or global actors, while totally ignoring or justifying similar behavior by others with whom they have certain ideological affinity, or whom they consider as representing a necessary or a milder form of evil. 2) A political speech.

Sebgorkalogy: An academic nondiscipline that focuses on digging up ancient grievances lingering in the backgrounds of one’s unconscious then projecting them onto one’s analysis of contemporary realities leading to such farcical conclusions as: Radical Islamic Terrorism poses a serious and existential threat to Western civilization. The conclusion is farcical of its failure to explain how terrorists operating in small cells and groups armed with improvised weapons or weapons purchased on the black market and who come from mostly underdeveloped countries, often from failing states, or from marginalized classes within western societies that represent a small fraction of their overall population can actually pose an existential threat to the richest most developed countries on earth protected as they are by the most powerful and advanced armies and most sophisticated law enforcement agencies in the world. Sebgorkalogy texts are considered holy by the Bannonites who use them to rationalize their inherently shitty attitude towards Muslims and others. Indeed, Sebgorkalogists are considered to be a subsect of the Bannonites and, like them, they maintain a strict diet of shit and hot air. The founder of Sebgorkalogy, Seb the Ass, is known to be one of Bannon the Stiff’s close disciples. Temples dedicated to the study of Sebgorkalogy are known as Sebtic Tanks.

Sebtik Tanks: Temples dedicated to the study of Sebgorkalogy

Seriese Consecuencese: 1) A rare type of worm known to specifically inhabit the anal fissure of Russian Czar Vladdie the Pu, AKA Ivan the Orrible; 2) A mental illness characterized by impulsive overreaction to an idiotic challenge to one's own foolhardy overreach.

Sheer Shittery: All political discourse attempting to deny, whitewash, justify and/or legitimate authoritarianism and human rights violations.

(The) Shirk ‘N’ Shift (Also, the Shirk & Shift): The political and social practice of shirking responsibility for a certain developing situation, while attempting to shift the blame for the eventual mess resulting from the failure to act in a timely and effective fashion unto other parties.

Example: Since the outset of the Syrian Revolution, President Barack Obama has been engaging in a vigorous regime of Shirk ‘N’ Shift; the result: the worst humanitarian disaster in decades, weakened allies, empowered enemies and the collapse of the ethical underpinning of the Global Order. Furthermore, that American credibility that Obama vowed to restore at the beginning of his presidency might have just received her coup de grâce.

(The) Shitealists: A political movement dedicated to changing the world and achieving global peace by negotiating with the lions and joining them in fucking the sheep, in the hope that the more fucked up the sheep get the more sheepish they will become, thus, improving the chances of peacemaking. The Shitealists are the ideological enemies of the LeoCons.

(The) Shitly Witly: A financial one-stop shopping mall for the corrupt and authoritarian rulers and their families and friends, as well as for thieving entrepreneurs, terrorist groups, drug lords, human traffickers, and all other similarly honest representatives of our darkest human impulses. The mall features a variety of luxury stores run by major bank executives and major international law firms offering services that enable their psychopathic clientele to keep sleeping well at night, despite the hard work involved in the daily fleecing, skinning and occasional culling of the flock. The Shitly Witly is a limited liability corporation owned by the United Cullers of Humandom (see under U). Other superstores also run by the UCH include: The Shitly Knitly, a designer superstore for the Shitty and Infamous, The Shitly Bitly, an electronics superstore for the same clientele, The Shitly Kitly, a designer drug store, The Shitly Hitly, your one-stop shop for the best hitmen with the shittiest morals, and The Shitly Titly – a shitlymen club.

(The) Shit Shat: A sex game that is quite popular within the ranks of the Shitty and Infamous, and is largely believed to be the main cause behind the malodorous aroma that usually surrounds shitlymen clubs, such as the Shitly Titly chain (Also see the Shitly Witly).

Shitswhatswecallit: Lying on the western banks of the Pussyssippi River, the town of Shitswhatswecallit is said to be the birthplace of Bannon the Still, the founder of the Bannonite religious sect.

Shtweet: To shtweet is to tweet out of one’s ass. A shtweet is usually accompanied by a loud fart which seems to be nature’s way of giving the intended audience a timely heads-up so they can experience the full impact of the coming shtweet.

Sisi: An ancient Egyptian epithet given to a weak Pharaoh whose true loyalty often goes to the highest fucker. Not to be confused with… Mubarak: an ancient Egyptian epithet given to the Pharaoh who survives by devouring his subjects. Historically speaking, a Mubarak was often followed by a Sisi, usually after a brief interregnum of bullshittery. For his part, a Sisi often meets a tragic end and is usually followed by long period of chaos and blood-fuckery. 

Slim Jong-Un: The smart, dashing and rational alter ego of North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un believed to be hiding somewhere deep within the inner folds of the latter’ tortured mind and soul. Yet, no amount of prayer has so far managed to coax him out of his hiding place, as the clock ticks away the moments separating us from Armageddon.  

Spokesghouls: Spokespeople of authoritarian regimes. Just like the rulers they serve, they usually have the morals of lice, the demeanor of mice and the looks of your average street-tested trashcan. On occasions, the term could be modified into spokesmotherghoul or spokesfienghouls (See Fienghouls).

(The) Smell Test: A hazing ceremony introduced by President Donald J. Trump for all people visiting the White House. Visitors will have to eat a Taco at a Trump-owned restaurant an hour before the visit, then, they are told to joyfully smell each other’s butts in order to determine whose fart smells…the sweetest? Surprise! The secret to the sweet smell is that the main ingredients in Trump Tacos have been genetically modified to give off a pleasant aroma after passing through the gastrointestinal tract. This is indeed why, or so we are told, President Trump seems to enjoy the smell and taste of his own feces, and this is why his addiction to bullshit should not be so surprising. Warning: the ingredients in Trump Tacos, among other Trump food products, may sweeten the farts and feces, but have been shown to fry the brain matter in controlled lab tests. 

Sushi Saudimi: A particularly spicy fish dish popular in Saudi Arabia and other member states of the Gulf Cooperation Council. It is often made with the Khalijli fish, native to Gulf waters, but on many occasions Khayali and Wahmi fish, also native to Gulf waters, are also added to the mix. First, the fish is chopped and left to marinate overnight in unrefined oil, while a special sheikh intones verses of the Furqan, a special Qur’an which certain Wahhabi scholars believe that only fish can understand. Then, the fish is cooked within the bowls of a dead camel where it is slowly roasted for 24-36 hours by the natural gasses emanating from the decaying corpse and trapped within the bowls. A special scholar is, then, called upon to make the first cut in the camel’s abdomen to retrieve the fish bits, now thoroughly cooked. Finally, and just before consumption, the fish gets drenched with special Wahhabi sauce who secret is known only to the special ruling council of the Wahhabi Establishment. Before partaking of the delicacy, remember to incant the famous prayer “Aakuluki wa akrahu n-Nisaa’ wa akta’u raas al-shu’araa, ithan ana Wahhabi,” which you would understand had you been a fish.

Syrialysis: A form of paralysis that befalls some politicians whenever they are required to do the moral thing in the absence of any guarantees of eventual success and accolades.


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